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Before and After Loss: A Neurologist's Perspective on Loss, Grief, and Our Brain
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Audible Audiobook
Listening Length: 5 hours and 56 minutes
Program Type: Audiobook
Version: Unabridged
Publisher: Tantor Audio
Audible.com Release Date: December 2, 2018
Whispersync for Voice: Ready
Language: English, English
ASIN: B07KQ4N2CB
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
I initially got this book out of the library and appreciated it so much that I knew I had to have my own copy. I'm in a similar situation which made the book, in some instances, a little hard to read. At the same time, I found it a very important book in that the author couples her personal experiences with the findings of a medical researcher. I have recommended this book to other caregivers, to two people who recently experienced loss, to health care providers, and to a funeral home director. For anyone experiencing the before and/or the after of loss, or are seeing it in loved ones, patients, or clients, this book is a must-have, in my opinion.
Interesting take on grief.
Great handbook for some situations, not all, such as dementia & sudden loss.
Dr. Shulman's book goes beyond an academic explanation of the neurological impact of traumatic loss by placing scientific understanding within the context of her own intensely personal bereavement experience: the untimely death of her husband from cancer. She strikes the perfect balance between memoir and scientific discussion of a phenomenon that touches us all.Although Dr. Shulman touched on the role of religion at the end of the book as a tool for comfort to grieving individuals, I was surprised that she discussed so much about bereavement without even a word about soul, spirit, other side experiences, or questions of "where we go" when we die. Given the explosion of mainstream interest in afterlife phenomena in the past few decades (eg, near-death experiences, evidential medium communication, reincarnation), it was surprising that she did not consider the role of these experiences in processing the death of loved ones. For example, her otherwise brilliant discussion of dreams as unconscious attempts at integration of loss into one's identity assumes the dreamer is operating in a "closed system" and does not even consider the possibility that the soul or spirit of the deceased may have the capability of interacting with the bereaved in some way. I found that odd, since so many grievers claim to have special dreams about their deceased loved ones that are "more than" the many "normal" dreams they have about them, dreams that feel more like "visitations." Dr. Shulman mentions an experience in which she "feels" her dead husband crawl in bed next to her; her explanation that this was a "tactile dream" was not credible to me. Such an experience begs the question that perhaps the dead, in some ethereal form, can visit the living; as a scientist, why does she rule out such a possibility?Back in the 1950's, doctors routinely rejected any patient experiences that were outside the realm of materialistic science and discouraged patients from reporting NDE's, death-bed visions, crisis apparitions, or after-death communication. But after sixty years of work in this area by legitimate researchers (eg, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, Raymond Moody, Ian Stevenson, Bruce Greyson, Jim Tucker, Bill & Judy Guggenheim), theoretical debates on consciousness outside the brain, and popular books (eg, Eben Alexander, Anita Moorjani), it is amazing that Dr. Shulman does not even mention the possible role of such phenomena, vis à vis brain activity, in bereavement experience.Yes, I get it, maybe it's beyond the scope of Dr. Shulman's book. But tactile dreams? That sounds ridiculous as the only explanation offered for her experience! I've never had a tactile dream, have you? I've dreamt of my mother hundreds of times since her death decades ago, but only ONE that I would describe as a visitation, two weeks after she passed. Why was that one different? Dr. Shulman may be letting down her readers who must make due with a closed-system explanation of such an experience that ignores the possibility of the supernatural.
Done!!I truly enjoyed listening to Dr. Shulman’s book on Audible. The story of the author’s journey was beautifully written, and artfully read by the narrator. I was inspired by the way Dr. Shulman and her late husband thoughtfully cared for each other until the end. I felt privileged to hear the intimate details of their story. The analysis of the emotional, social and physical changes one goes through in life after loss was also very interesting. The author describes many of her feelings and experiences with grief, and then pairs them with sound scientific explanations. I am glad I read this book, and I am certain that I’ll circle back to it for comfort and guidance in the future.
For anyone who has experienced a traumatic loss (or cares about someone who has) this book has so much to offer. First, Dr Shulman shares a nuanced narrative of her own traumatic loss. Then, she describes her experiences through the eyes of a curious scientist-practitioner. So glad I read this book! As a school psychologist, It will help me to better understand and describe symptoms of trauma and adaptive coping mechanisms to my own students.
A wonderful read for anyone going through a loss and looking for a different and unique perspective. Also makes a great holiday gift for the right person! Highly recommend!
Well I am not quite sure that the book gave me a lot of hope. Well it was honest and open and made sense but it wasn’t a rainbow filled happy ending.
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